Our Lady Star of the Sea

Marriage Guidelines

Our Lady Star of the Sea welcomes you and congratulates you as you come to request marriage in the Catholic Church. The celebration you are planning and the lifelong commitment you are choosing to make, are a sign of God’s great love for all of us.

Either the bride or the groom must be a registered parishioner for at least 6 months prior to planning the wedding of Our Lady Star of the Sea. Registration under your parents is not considered a registered parishioner.

To request a date please contact Debby Veltri (313-884-5554 or [email protected]). The Archdiocese of Detroit asks for at least 6 months for marriage preparation.

Remember that this engagement time is not primarily a time to prepare for a wedding—but rather a time to prepare for the Sacrament of marriage. It is a time to examine your decision to enter into a commitment of marriage; your relationship as a couple; and your readiness for the responsibilities of married life.

Please make your engagement gift to one another by using it as a time to consider, seriously, your intention to enter into marriage.

Whose Wedding?

Yours—and the Church’s. You marry each other. You promise each other lasting love and fidelity. But you do this before the celebrant as witness for the whole Church which has a profound concern for the happiness of your marriage as do your family, relatives and friends who gather to celebrate your wedding day.

The policies stated here are those of both the Archdiocese of Detroit and the Parish. These policies offer our best help to you for a delightful and prayerful wedding day.

Marriage Preparation

Now that you have chosen a special partner with whom you plan to share the rest of your life with, a more in-depth consideration of marriage is necessary. Archdiocesan policy and the policy of this parish requires mandatory participation in a marriage preparation program. We require one-on-one counseling between your partner, yourself and a marriage counselor.

You will complete a computerized questionnaire online. When the results of the questionnaire are received they are forwarded to our professional marriage counselor. You will discuss the results with them for a minimum of 2 sessions. Further sessions may be required at the discretion of the counselor. There is a fee for this program and will be payable to the counselor at the first session.

You will also be required to attend a Marriage preparation program through the Archdiocese. To view the workshops please visit HERE

Our goal is to provide each couple with the information and skills that should lead to a deeper understanding of each other and a healthier marriage.


All Catholic brides and grooms are expected to have received the Sacrament of Confirmation. If you have not received the sacrament, be sure to let us know so that necessary arrangements may be made.

Previous Marriages

If there are previous marriages on the part of either party, Catholic or non-Catholic, be certain to tell the priest immediately. He will advise you of what can or needs to be done. No date for marriage can be arranged until the freedom to marry is legitimately established

Church Fees

It is a custom of the parish to receive a monetary gift on the occasion of your wedding. Your gift represents your faith to the parish community. This gift is not payment for the priest but will be used as a monetary gift to the Parish. The suggested amount for an active parishioner is $300. If you choose to give the priest an honorarium, a suggestion is $200

Planning the Wedding Liturgy

Guidelines for planning the liturgy - click here

Click HERE for reading and Gospel selections

Music Guidelines

Our Lady Star of the Sea’s Music Minister will provide piano, organ, and vocal music for your wedding. Please contact our Music Minister approximately 1 months prior to your wedding (especially if you would like to hire additional instrumentalists/vocalists). During our meeting the Music Minister will assist you in making musical selections that both honor the Sacrament of marriage and celebrate this momentous day! Guest organists/friends of the family are allowed to minister for weddings after receiving approval from the music minister. The fee, available when you speak to the Music Minister covers all preparations for the Mass as well as the wedding ceremony.

If you care to hire additional instrumentalists or vocalists, our music minster can help secure these musicians for you. Those musicians set their own fees, which will be due the day of the wedding.

A select number of parish cantors are available to sing for weddings. The cantor will assist the assembly in singing and is also able to provide solo vocal music. The cantor can also be obtained from our Music Minister.

Flowers Guidelines

These are general guidelines regarding flowers for your wedding.

Flowers are allowed in the sanctuary in front of the altar, candle stands and lectern. Flowers are not allowed on the altar itself and arrangements should not exceed altar height of 42”(including stand).

Flowers and bows are allowed on the pews. However, fire code prohibits the use of candles on the pews.

Any floral arrangements or decorations already in place in the sanctuary must remain and may not be removed or dismantled. Please let your florist know the church is available for delivery and setup of flowers, pew bow, etc., no sooner than one hour prior to the beginning of your ceremony. Runners and rose petals are not allowed, no exceptions.

The church appreciates the gift of your flowers left in the sanctuary.


Your rehearsal date and time is scheduled through our Pastoral Associate at the time you schedule your wedding. They are normally scheduled for the day prior to the wedding starting at 6:00pm or when the church is available. Please confirm that a date and time has been set.

At The Wedding

The following guidelines are to be observed:

The church is available to you and all those involved with your wedding 30 minutes prior to the beginning of the ceremony and 30 minutes after the ceremony ends.

Your professional photographer is allowed 30 minutes prior to the beginning of the ceremony and 30 minutes after the ceremony for photographs. Please instruct your photographer to avoid a flash during your vows and at the consecration.

Your professional videographer is allowed 30 minutes prior to the beginning of the ceremony and 30 minutes after the ceremony for videotaping. Flood lighting is not allowed and cameras are to remain stationary.

There is a small room available for the Bride and Bridesmaids to touch up and wait for the ceremony to begin at the church.

Reception lines are not to be formed in the vestibule of the church. There will be no exceptions!

It is your responsibility to leave the church as clean as you find it. Please choose someone that is not in your wedding party to assist you with removing pew bow, collect programs, etc. from the church.

Throwing rice, bird seed, confetti or releasing balloons after the ceremony is not allowed.

Absolutely no smoking in church or the church vestibule and no consumption of alcohol on church grounds.

The chewing of gum is not allowed in church. Please make sure your attendants are aware of this rule.

Please turn off cell phones while in church.


Applying for Marriage License:

You must obtain a marriage license from the County Clerk of the county in which either applicant resides. If both parties are non- residents of Michigan, the applicants must apply in the county in which the marriage is performed.

Application Fees: differ in every county.

Waiting period: There is a 3 day waiting period after the application and before the license may be issued. The marriage is void unless the marriage is solemnized within 33 days from the date of application. DO NOT APPLY MORE THAN 33 DAYS NOR LESS THAN 3 WORKING DAYS FROM YOUR WEDDING DATE. The license is only valid in Michigan.

County Clerks Offices:

Wayne County Clerk, Detroit, MI 313.224.6262

Macomb County Clerk, Mt. Clemens, MI 586.469.5120

Oakland County Clerk, Pontiac, MI 248.858.0572

Marriage Resources

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